Realities of an Average Snowboarder

In honor of the Olympics I decided to write about my own experiences as a snowboarder. My favorite Winter Olympic events to watch are the Snowboard Cross and the Halfpipe. I watch these events in awe at their ability to do these amazing things; the speed, the precision, the tricks, the DARINGness, etc. and I always get a small, very small, thought of, "They make that look so easy. Maybe I should try to go snowboarding a little more and then I will be able to do the McTwist." and then I chuckle as reality cruelly comes back into focus. I am but a humble snowboarder who is happy doing the "falling leaf" down the mountain and excited when I can carve. (No worries, every year I'm improving a little)

So here is just a little fun as I list some of the realities, experiences and "must do's" of the snowboarding world.

A snowboarder must wear at least one item of ridiculous clothing (if not the entire outfit)
OR! At least something that STANDS OUT! This is one area where I fall short as a snowboarder. My coat, pants, boots, bindings, board, goggles, gloves, etc all coordinate and in subtile ways. Oops.

Getting-off-the-lift Anxiety
Oooooh yeah, it's a thing! It is a right of passage to be able to get off the lift without falling. It takes concentration, balance, and a little prayer in your heart saying, "PLEASE don't make me fall in front of everyone again! I promise to be a better person!" When I first started snowboarding I would stop in the middle of conversations to prepare myself to get off the lift; everyone on the chair would become invisible to me yet I would be panicked I would be knocking them over in a few seconds as well.

Just watch:

The celebration of getting off the lift without falling
Yup... this is a thing too! It is as if you try to play it cool until you know, without a doubt, you will not topple over and then... you celebrate. Whether it be a loud cheer or whoop! Or a silent put your hand in a fist pulling your arm down, while whispering, "yes!"

I have a friend, Spencer, that I love to go snowboarding with because we are at the same level but we also push each other to get better. Spencer is about 6'2" and I... am not. I was with him his very first time ever trying out snowboarding when a group of our college friends went snowboarding. The first time he and I rode the lift together I assured him he could get off the lift without falling (clearly I was lying but I was trying to give him a little confidence). Well it came time to get off the lift and we started to smoothly slide down the small slope when *WACK* he completely took me out. Ahahahaha! The best part were these two punk teenage snowboarders who saw this happen and one said to the other, "Dude! That guy took that little girl OUT!" You can bet Spencer was celebrating the day when he could consistently get off the lift without falling over.

The celebration of reaching each stage of snowboarding

1. Stopping
2. Getting off the lift without falling*
3. The Falling Leaf
4. Riding Toe Side
5. C-Turns
6. S-Turns
7. Carving
8. Speed
9. Jumps
10. Tricks in The Park
11. The Olympics

*This really could fall anywhere on the list... if you are lucky it happens at the beginning of learning how to snowboard.

A Consistent Hatred of Cat-tracks
Ugh! Nothing is worse than getting stuck on a flat area of the mountain. These situations tend to lead to scootching your body in a weird fashion which leads to exhaustion, hopping about in a side to side and slightly forward motion which also leads to exhaustion, getting on your hands and knees and hopping forward or undoing your bindings and walking to a snowboard friendly area. Good thing none of these actions are humiliating... oh wait... they are.

My thanks go out to any skier who's ever helped me out in these situations and held out their pole for me to hold on to while they pulled me along.

Yeah... this is a good interpretation of my feeling of ending up on a cat-track; especially when it is a complete surprise.

The Sore Bum, Wrists and/or Neck at the end of the day
It's inevitable. The sore bum and wrists seem to come from falling over; especially when trying to get better at certain things. And the neck comes from those knock-the-air-out-of-you tumbles. I'm too old for those things.

The snowboard itch on a powdery day
It's a lot more fun to fall over into powder; I am much more brave and willing to try new things when there is a think layer of powdery/fresh snow. When it is snowing a lot and I know the mountains are filling up with new snow I ache at the idea that I have to wait for the weekend to go (Stupid grown-up jobs). Who wouldn't want to go snowboarding in this:

Other Fun Things About Snowboarding
Talks with Friends on the lifts.
Meeting new people and hearing their stories while on the lifts.
That peaceful/quite feel on a snowy night for night boarding.
Fresh air.
Being out in nature.
Doing something you love and enjoy.