Book Reviews: How to Win Friends and Influence People, Inside the Magic Kingdom and The Servant

A few more reviews from my readings from my 2014 reading list. I decided to group together my reviews of the books that I read with the purpose of improving my employee/employer self.

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
I enjoyed this book, it was an easy read and a good reminder of the simple things you should be doing anyways when working with others and even more simply how to best treat others. As I was reading the book I kept thinking, I used to be good at that but I need to start to practice it again, I try to do that, etc. It was nice to see that I already practice some of these things but also a reminder of what I desperately need to work on. It was also fun to think of others in my life that I admire and think, "They are so good at this." A lot of the topics in this book talk about being sincere, being positive, lifting others up, being genuine, challenging yourself and more. There are three sections of principles in the book and at the end of each section the principles for that set are listed for a nice review. I would recommend this book.
My dad loves this book and I can actually see a lot of things from this book that he has been teaching myself and my siblings while we grew up in his home.

Inside the Magic Kingdom by Tom Connellan
This was not on the list but we read it for work and I absolutely loved it. It is written in story format and it is basically tells how Disney run's their customer service. It is amazing how Disney looks at every little detail and how it puzzles together the big picture and they have a team attitude among all of their employees. Nobody is too high up to have to stop and pick up some trash because the main goal of the organization is to make sure their customers have the best experience they can have; it's a very selfless environment. It was really neat to read about the little details that Disney takes care of in their parks each night to make sure that whether it is your first time at DisneyWorld or your 20th time, the park and environment is still at it's best; for example: re-painting posts in the park every night and scientifically measuring the moisture in the air to make sure they are finished painting by a certain time so that the paint is dry by the time the park re-opens in the morning.
This is a fast read, very fun and extremely interesting. After reading the book I wanted to go work for Disney.

The Servant: A Simple Story about Leadership by James Hunter
This book was also written in story format and I loved this one as well. The main idea of this book is to lead others by loving them. When we treat others with love and respect, they will be more willing to follow and do what they have been asked to do. As I read this book I thought a lot about the student leaders that I lead and those that I have taken the time to love and sacrifice for are those who work even harder. Something else I liked about this book is it stresses that you can demand authority and manipulate people for what you want but that will only last for so long; it is love and service that will last a life time. One of my coworkers is very good at manipulation and he openly talks about it and how he will very carefully word his conversations with others to get what he wants. All this has done for me is to be very cautious around him and almost question when he is being sincere of if he is just trying to get something out of me that he wants. It has been a lesson to me to be sincere with others and to always look for win-win situations when I need to negotiate things.
This was a quick read and a good reminder of how to conduct my self everyday and with everyone... not just in the work place.

It Means I Love You

When I was little, one day at church I was sitting next to my mom on our pew trying to hold still, but really wanting to be wiggling, dancing, playing and well whatever else a tiny person wants to be doing, when I noticed on the back of my mom's hand this little dark pink dot over one of her blood vessels and I quietly asked my mom what it was. She bent over and whispered in my ear that if I pressed it would go away. Sure enough, after I lightly pressed it, it disappeared.

I immediately looked up at my mom, wide-eyed, worried as to where it had gone. She then bent over again and said, "If it comes back, it means I love you." Slowly the red mark reappeared and I looked up at my mom with a huge smile on my face because it came back and that meant something. Throughout my childhood I would often touch my mom's pink dot to see if it would ever not come back but it always did. It was a constant reminder that I was loved.

My mom never treated my siblings and I like we were more important than others, no, she taught us to love others, look for the good in them and appreciate their differances. My mom never spoiled us, but instead taught us how to work hard for the things we got in life. BUT she always made sure we knew we were loved, in so many ways. My mom raised my siblings and I with so much love; a home full of love. I can't wait to one day do the same for my kids.

I was actually rock-climbing at a gym a few weeks ago and was climbing a more challenging route and tried to jump to a hold but instead missed it and some how cut the back of my hand during my fall. The scab that formed on the back of my hand was in the same place and shape as my mom's little pink dot. I actually secretly hoped it would turn into my own pink dot. But it didn't. Oh well, I'll just have to figure out and different subtle way to constantly tell my kids I love them.

Oh Jimmy

When I went to live with my friend for a month in Connecticut we attended the Yale YSA branch and were instantly engulfed into their "family" unit. It was fun to get to know and spend time with all of these people from around the US who were attending college, employed as nannies or born and raised in the area. One of these fine, but interesting, people was Jimmy. Jimmy was a very kind but innocently honest person and it became a very funny thing with my friend and I.

At one church event I was sitting, eating, and talking with a group of people and Jimmy came up behind me and looked down at the top of my head and announced, "Oh wow Amy! You sure do have a lot of grey hairs on your head."

Another time I was talking to Jimmy and when I was in the middle of a sentence he interrupted me and said, "Umm, you have this glob of mascara or something on your cheek, Yuck." and then he made a fake gagging sound.

And there is a hilarious trail of these incidences.

Now you may think, this person sounds so stupid and rude but honestly we found it comical because we were pretty sure Jimmy didn't realize how awkward and rude these comments and moments were. He was just innocently honest but had a heart of gold. It soon became a thing with us to say, "Guess what Jimmy said..." haha and then we would reply with a chuckle-sigh and say, "Oh Jimmy,"

I sure do miss my "Jimmy" moments. And I really want to make it a thing to say, "Oh Jimmy" when someone does something that's maybe slightly socially awkward or acceptable and then laugh/shrug it off, rather than get your feathers ruffled.

Jimmy and I bowling on my 26th birthday.

2015 You Will Be The Year That I Read!

This is getting sad, there are some books on this list that have been repeating on this list for YEARS... it's getting embarrassing. Here's the proof: 2014's List

I have to admit, I watch TV when I need to vedge and I really should do something that's enjoyable but builds more character and exercises my brain. I actually made a goal back in October to finish up 3 shows I have been watching on netflix, pathetic I know, and then to swear of "TV" until I finish the below list. After that I'm going to allow myself to watch some TV but my plan is to be more balanced with TV and reading or of course other things.

Of course if someone wants to go to a movie or watch some TV while hanging out I'm ok with that but I need to stop spending the alone time that I sometimes crave by watching TV and instead do the things I always wish I made time for.

Here's my reading list for the year:

Books I have started but have not finished:

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexander Dumas

Mediation and the Atonement of Christ by John Taylor

The Three Musketeers by Alexander Dumas

Books to Read this year

Deception Point by Dan Brown

Utopia by Sir Thomas More

The Scarlet Pimpernel by Baroness Orczy

The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell

The Servant by James C. Hunter

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

Les Miserables by Victor Hugo

Twenty Years After by Alexander Dumas

Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

Books I would like to read but only if I miraculously finish the above books this year:

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy

Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens

Bossy Pants by Tina Fey

Believing Christ by Stephen E. Robinson

As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

Serena by Ron Rash

Probably a teen novel... why not ;)

Book Review: Divergent Series

Oh look! Three more books I read in 2014 that were not on my reading list. I should feel good that I got so many books in; even if they weren't on the list. Life is better that way anyways, right? I went and saw the Divergent movie with my roommates and I really enjoyed it which I was worried I would be a little lost watching it, having not read the book. But after the movie I was intrigued enough, I wanted to read the book. Plus the guy who played Four (Theo James) was hot... here take a gander:

I needed an escape from work but it had to be a quick easy read and Divergent fit the bill; just something I could quickly read a chapter or two before bed. I read Divergent in about 10 days and I liked it a lot more than The Hunger Games. Once I read Divergent I had to find out what happened next and how the series concluded and so I continued on. It took me longer to read Insurgent and Allegiant because I had gotten even busier with work that it was either sleep or read... I choose sleep. However, the 2nd and 3rd book didn't draw me in like Divergent had, I only kept reading out of curiosity but not out of being pulled in to books with a 100% page-turner style. HOWEVER, they were entertaining enough that I wanted to keep reading.

The series is about a post-apocalyptic world set in Chicago. The society has learned to survive by dividing the people into 5 factions (groups): Abnegation - the selfless and always putting other's needs before their own, Erudite - the curious and intelligent, Dauntless - the brave and courageous, Amity - the peaceful (they make me think of hippie tree-huggers), and Candor - the honest (to a fault sometimes).

The book is centered around Tris (Beatrice), who is Abnegation born, and it begins with the time in her life where she is old enough to choose to remain in Abnegation for the rest of her life or if she will choose to transfer to another faction. Everyone her age takes a test to help them know which faction they would do best in, the only problem is she gets results for three factions which can only mean one thing: Tris is Divergent. Nobody can know she is Divergent or else she will be killed; but why?! I guess you'll have to read to find out.

I really like Tris' character, she has a strong personality without being flashy. I like that she is determined to go for the things that are true to herself and is brave enough to make hard decisions, even though she knows it will crush her parents for her to transfer to a different faction she feels more connected with, she still has compassion and concern for them, she also knows that it is important to be a little selfish and go where she knows she can use her true talents and be happy.

With this being a teen novel of course there is a "love" story within the trilogy. But that's ok, it's a good love story without a lot of mushy-gushy-ness. The love interest is between Tris and her Divergent trainer (no worries, he's only a few years older than she is), Four. I think the reason why I really enjoy this love interest is because Four is attracted to Tris for her independence and he let's her be independent. They become a team together and lift and build each other up.

Divergent
The first of the books sets up the intriguing plot. Tris chooses to transfer to Dauntless and she trains to be a member of Dauntless... not without it's challenges and extreme competitiveness. Transferring to Dauntless makes it incredible difficult to hide her Divergent identity and even puts her in danger.

Insurgent
War breaks out between factions and choosing sides will be tricky. Some factions are after the Divergent members of the society and others want to protect. But why does everyone care so much if the Divergent live or die? The cliff-hanger at the end of this books reveals a lot.

Allegiant
When offered the chance to leave the city and explore the unknown land outside of it, Tris and Four with others take the chance. They come to see a whole new reality of where they came from and they even find themselves among new challenges and questioning the nature of humanity. The first two books are told from Tris' prospective but this book is told from Tris and Four's prospective which actually gets a little confusing at times if you forget who's voice you are reading.

One of the thing I liked about this series were some of the though provoking and truthful quotes. The following is a quote by Four and I think it is a simple reminder that we are all hurting and being challenged in some way, usually in ways that others don't even know, and so we need to remember that whom ever we are with, we are there to help each other.

"Since I was young, I have always know this: Life Damges us, everyone. We can't escape that damage. But now, I am also learning this: We can be mended. We mend each other."

2014! You've already come and gone?!

Disclaimer
This post is more honest than usual and so it probably will sound like I am super depressed but I am not, I am just fine. I just thought I might show a little of "I'm human and not perfect." I truly am so blessed in my life and have so much to be grateful for... which I am grateful for those blessings.

Review
2014 was not my finest or proudest year. I cried a lot this year, oh man a lot. I complained a lot this year. I doubted myself a lot this year. I lost a lot of confidence this year. My job requires a lot of over time to keep things functioning and to run a good and respectable program; with that came with a lot of nights of limited sleep, quick snarffing meals at my desk, cutting out working out, random to few social interactions with people outside of my job, turning down big church callings, and the list runs on. My life was my job this year; for better and for worse. I felt selfish this year as I got lonely and kept thinking about all the little every day to day things I never got to do because there wasn't time.

But with the bad there was some incredible "goods" this year. I worked harder than I have ever worked. I got small glimpses of what it will be like to be a mom being the boss of 42 student workers and even though it can be hard and frustrating, it was also extremely rewarding to help/watch them overcome small to big challenges and even more when they couldn't wait to share the experience with me. Even more was getting to learn from each of them, laugh with them, and even though they were my 42 employees I love them as if they were my own. I wouldn't trade the opportunity to be a mom some day for anything else.

I decided to go 100 days without Facebook over the summer and I absolutely loved it. It was almost refreshing not to read on a daily basis what people were eating for breakfast, what was the next thing to complain about or even just what everyone else was up to in their lives. I even missed the whole ice water bucket challenge and so glad I did. It was also nice to fill my time with other things. The only thing I missed was maybe learning about big events in other's lives but for the ones that truly mattered I found out in other ways. I think I am going to do this again this year!

My parents had to put our dog Jessie down. She was getting so old (15-years-old); blind, deaf and she was starting to look like she was in so much pain. It was time, she needed to be put down but that didn't make it any less sad. I'm missing her a lot and am SO puppy/dog hungry.

As independent I try to be I was so grateful for my close friends and family this year. Whenever I was about to give up or just needed a little boost I always seemed to get a funny or encouraging text, a thoughtful letter, a casual quick phone call or even a surprise visit. I'm grateful for these people in my life who always remind me to be better.

Travels
I did actually get some traveling in this year and I am so grateful for it; I think it was my escape. These were incredible trips and they were each much needed. It was hard to get excited for my trips because I would have to work up to the very last minute before I left and even more over-time than usual but it was worth the work because I needed the break and it seemed that going far away was the only way I could get a break.
North Carolina with friends

Camping in the Uintahs with my Family

Victoria with my mom

Italy with friends

Favorite Moments of This Year

• Being the boss of all of these incredible people (though I often forgot I was their boss because they are my friends/family):

• Really just the little simple moments of laughter and closeness when being home with my family; I sure love them and am so grateful I have a close family
• Dancing on a beach under the stars in North Carolina
• Finding out that when I am presenting I say, "with that" a lot when I am tying two thoughts together. My staff noticed it this summer and started to take a drink out of their water bottles every time I said "with that" while presenting to students and their parents (Ha, at least it wasn't "umm" or "like.").

Most Visited Blog Posts this Year
Friend Dates
The Realities of an Average Snowboarder
Blogs... They're Kind of Funny
The "Just Like Heaven" Debate
Do we still wonder?

Lessons Learned... I think...
Living an unbalanced life is unhealthy... dur.

I have to keep reminding myself that I need to keep my focus in the right place and remember my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ should be my focus and it won't always make things better but it sure will keep you strong and watched out for.

I need to stop worrying about what I should be doing and wondering if I am being a failure and just have faith that doing my best and keeping my focus in the right place is what is important and things will work out, even if it is not in the way I expect it to.

I need to stop being a perfectionist! Oh my gosh yes! I need to stop worrying about what others think and just be ok being me; no... love being me. I used to be good at this but I had to work hard at it and I think I stopped working hard and went back to worrying about who I was keeping happy and impressing. You know what? Who the heck cares; I'm going to be me and you better like it or hit the highway!

Wrap up
Again this year was hard and I could have had a 200 times better attitude (but that is the beauty of starting a new year: I can try to be better) but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

This next year I want to find time to be a little selfish but I also want to find more time to serve others as well.

Book Reviews: The Selected Series

So I have my giant reading list for the year and three of the books I read this year were not from my reading list. Ha, figures... I think I aim too high. However, when I posted my reading list I asked for recommendations and my friend Leah recommended The Selection by Kiera Cass. I read it and away I went with the entire trilogy. Leah quoted it as "It's a quick, fun read with lots of romance-y-ness." She was right and I loved it.

Of all the popular trilogies right now... Hunger Games, Divergent, and Matched that I have read, this was the only series where I loved the ending and I felt satisfied with how they wrapped everything up. All of the others felt rushed or unresolved in the end or completely off in left field from where the series started but this one kept me interested the entire time and I felt the resolution was planned from the beginning, making everything fall into place. I mean don't get me wrong, there were a few chapters here and there where I was thinking, "Oh no, is she starting to go off on a tangent?" but then she would bring it back in.

This book is set in a time in the future when The United States has fallen weak and has evolved into the caste system. Everyone is marked by their station with little hope of promoting themselves to a better level. The book is centered around the "selection" which is basically a G-Rated version of the Bachelor. Thirty-five girls are chosen from all of the castes to come and live at the castle where they date the Prince and he chooses his bride to be, to become a princess and one day the queen, from this group of girls.

Now don't just go and pooh pooh it off, off of that; it's actually a lot of fun. I think what I liked the most is the main girl in the books, America Singer. She is spunky, speaks her mind, kind, confident, considerate, fun, strong and lovable. But I also liked the entire other story going on; the books are not just about the Selection, they were also about how to improve the country and bring equality back to everyone.

Yes, this is a teen novel so of course this was light and fluffy but I didn't care. It was fun to be giddy and imagine being dressed up in the fancy ball gowns with all the girls and secretly hating Celeste (I guess you'll just have to read book to find out why we hate Celeste... or do we?). It was one of those books where you wished life really was that fair: a prince noticing you for being you and instantly falling in love with you just because you surprised him for being true to yourself.

The Selection
The first of the trilogy. The first 35 girls to be selected to the palace to be part of The Selection. This is where we meet the girls, the royal family, the hand-maids, the royal guard and of course... Prince Maxon.

The Elite
The group is narrowed down to 6 girls... "The Elite." America is torn between her childhood love and her new love for Maxon. While also the palace is being invaded by "The Rebels"... but what on earth could they be after?!

The One
The group is down to 4 girls and Prince Maxon must chose "The One" but not without some trials. The country is in chaos with riots, they King is trying to sabotage the relationship between America and Maxon, family members are dying, and the list goes on.